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10 Frequently Asked Questions

  • How can a positive attitude enable one to improve his/her life?

  • What can I do to feel better?

  • Why and how can one become an addict and what can you do to stop this dependency for me or one of my close relatives?

  • Is it normal to feel stressed, depressed or anxious?

  • With the life people live today, how can I have enough time to relax?

  • How can a shrink help me to reach my goals?

  • What can I do to make my spouse listen to me?

  • Why are the relationships with my child not easy?

  • Why change, since I have always been like that?

  • How can I manage mourning, separation and grief?

10 Questions fréquentes: FAQ

How can a positive attitude enable one to improve his/her life?

Remember the old saying: there are two kinds of people in the world. Those who see the glass half empty and those who see the glass half full. When you see the glass half full, you have learnt to enjoy what you have and you stop worrying about what you don’t have. When you enjoy the elements of your life, you not only generate a happier prospect, but also a longer and healthier life. A positive attitude also makes you sensitive to opportunities because you are able to consider them with a happy outcome. With positive thoughts, you do not linger on failures. You stop wasting your time and your energy. Rather use failures as a learning experience. Take advantage of your mistakes so as to have more success next time. You must look forward and leave the past in the past. The past is a burden that you need to resolve to break free from it. Moreover, positive attitudes are contagious, positive actions attract positive actions and shall unite positive energies around you. If you have one of the symptoms, contact me.

What can I do to feel better?

You are your greatest enemy!!!

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The key to a healthier attitude to feel well is the acceptation of oneself. Many people take themselves too seriously, focus on each of their faults. Try to be your best friend. The more you accept yourself, the better you will feel, and you will be more open to other people. List all your positive traits. These are your assets. Be proud of them and of yourself. Focus on them and incorporate them in your image. Besides, reward your efforts because, even if other people are not grateful, you know that you have given your best. Finally, rather focus on your own agenda than on the agenda of other people. Don’t worry about the approval of other people and be proud of yourself. Life is not an accumulation «of toys». Put emphasis on the reinforcement of positive interpersonal relationships. We are social creatures who like the pleasure of life. If you have one of the symptoms, contact me.

Why and how can one become an addict and what can you do to stop this dependency for me or one of my close relatives?

Addiction or dependency are very commonly used terms nowadays.

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There is an excess in our behavior towards food, alcohol, drugs, plastic surgery, work, sport, money, etc … to remedy our angst and that relieves us for a while. We try to be stronger, more handsome or prettier, to control ourselves better while we escape reality.

One of the latest dependencies for many people is the dependency on Internet or on video games that helps to fill the emptiness of solitude and to give a fake (non-)meaning to life thanks to the anonymity of a keyboard and screen. These people are afraid or are too shy to establish a personal relationship.

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For example, many people are addicted to food as a substitute for love and affection. The first stage to break a cycle of dependency consists in stopping to be too concerned looking for significant rewards. The second stage consists in knowing that you can overcome this concern. This is what people call self-efficacy. If you have one of the symptoms, contact me.

Is it normal to feel stressed, depressed or anxious?

Believe it or not, nearly 30 % of the population of the United States are depressed on a given day. Indeed, depression is often called « the cold of mental disorders ». This generally happens when we feel lost or when our self-esteem has been attacked. We are also fairly often worried when we are depressed. Anxiety may also be lived through without depression. For some of us, a moderate amount of stress is a positive force. It is only when you start feeling desperate that you may be suffering from depression. Here are some signs that may hide a depression : a changing mood, a feeling of uselessness, a problem of concentration, insomnia, sexual disorders, loss of memory and maybe even suicidal thoughts. Serious forms of anxiety are associated with health problems. The symptoms comprise : tremor and shock, the acceleration of the heart rate and breathlessness, dizzy spells, constant tiredness. If you have one of the symptoms, contact me.

With the life people live today, how can I have enough time to relax?

The most important advice that I can give as regards this question is that things should be put into perspective. What is your priority, nowadays?

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Many of the activities that we try to fit in one day put us under stress. We feel that we don’t have the time to … If you are able to reach one or even two goals with success in one day, consider yourself satisfied. It is true that, without a schedule, we waste time and feel bad but, if you have too many things to do, you can be sure that you’ll be stressed. Your health and your peace of mind are too precious for you not to devote time to them.

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Learn how to stop feeling guilty and take the time to wander around, to dream, to play with children, to have some coffee with your friends, to do nothing.

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Taking time is not wasting time !

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The people who succeed are prepared and calm.

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For you to be able to work efficiently, to have a good mood, you need to have the time to breathe and to learn about the activities that you wish to undertake and to find pleasure in the things that you do. If you can’t do it, contact me.

How can a "shrink" help me to reach my goals?

A « shrink » cannot decide for you.

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What a shrink may do is help you to reach your goals and to be better with yourself and other people. A shrink may also help you to be more efficient to reach your goals in your life. One of a shrink’s essential tasks is to put you in reality: the shrink is your « mirror ».

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If your goals are not well-defined and you ask yourself questions on your skills, the shrink will help you to ask yourself the right questions. Am I able to do it? Will I make it? Why? If you are in this case, contact me.

What can I do to make my spouse listen to me?

If you no longer get on well with your spouse and if your spouse doesn’t listen to you, it is probably due to the fact that there is a bad communication between the two of you and that some things were not said. Drawing the attention of someone cannot be done through weeping and shouting. A calm, insistent manner will help the other person to listen to you. If your spouse or partner keeps ignoring you after serious efforts to communicate with him/her, then, it is time to take a stand. You may have to insist on mediation through a third party and to start a couple therapy. If you are in this case, contact me.

Why are the relationships with my child not easy?

You are responsible for your offspring. Your child is the reflection of yourself and of the energy that he receives through education, school and the family atmosphere. You are your child’s primary influence until the beginning of adolescence.

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While each child has got his/her own disposition and personality, he/she learns how to socialize through his parents. Rudeness, disrespect and aggressiveness and other forms of disrespectful attitudes are all caused by an inadequate or deficient parental control. Children need to know that there is an adult person who will watch over them and who will set limits to their behavior. Parents are wrong to believe that their children will hate them if they discipline them and give them rules. In fact, it is the opposite. One of the basic tasks of a child’s development is to learn that he is not the center of the world. If you are in this case, contact me.

Why change, since I have always been like that?

Because it doesn’t work any longer! We do not change when everything is fine, we change when something is wrong : overwork, lack of appetite or bulimia, insomnia, bad temper, constant tiredness, a low self-esteem and you are sick and tired.

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When we look for new answers, when we no longer love our life, it is because a change in behavior is necessary and it is time to speak about it. If you are in this case, contact me.

How can I manage mourning, separation and grief?

A sentimental bereavement is similar to a bereavement related to death, but there is a basic difference: the rejection that we suffer from, for it directly affects self-esteem and self-confidence.

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In both cases, we suffer from the loss of a beloved person, either through death or through the separation that ruins us and will make us suffer for a long time. You will go through several states: grief, helplessness, anger, depression, regrets and many other feelings. You won’t forget and you will have to live with it. You need to talk about it, but with whom? If you are in this case, contact me.

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